Valentine's Day postscript

I spoke too soon about the Valentine's Day party.  I knew all the food that came to the party, and I thought several times about checking what game they would play, but I didn't want to be a pain and who would play a food game with all that food at the party?  

Well, the kids did their craft, a cute little "love" sign, and then they split up into groups to play the game and eat.  The mom who brought the game started getting Hershey's kisses out of a bag.  I leaned in and asked if the game involved touching Hershey's kisses and explained Little Dude couldn't do that.  She looked at me like I'm an idiot and said, "He can't touch foil?"  If I'd had more presence of mind I would have replied, "Would you like your child to touch poison wrapped up in foil?  No, he can't touch the foil!"  But, I just shook my head instead.  She went about setting up the game and I pulled Little Dude aside and explained that he couldn't play.  I was so mad and upset I wanted to just leave, but Little Dude really wanted to stay, so we did.  He watched the other kids play the game and wandered around for awhile until it was his group's turn to eat.  At the end of the game the kids were given stickers, so I leaned in to at least grab some stickers for Little Dude, at which point the mom finally said "Sorry" in a not-so-sincere kind of way. 

I know the whole thing was my fault -- I should have checked on the game ahead of time.  I just get so tired of being that mom.  But it would be better to be that mom ahead of time and in private with just the mom concerned rather than totally losing my cool in front of all the moms at the party.  I just feel so bad for Little Dude.  I hope he doesn't remember that party forever.

Valentine's Day

I just have to share what Little Dude's class is having for their Valentine's Day party:

Valentine’s Candy
Beverage
Chocolate dipped strawberries
Salty snacks (3 different ones!)
Sweet snack (popsicle)
Veggie & fruit trays

The moms have been very nice about trying to include Little Dude, and letting me know what to bring and make.  But seriously -- do six-year-olds need this much food for a Valentine's Day party?  Am I alone in remembering that we used to get conversation hearts and maybe a cupcake?  I always wonder if I would feel this way without the food allergies, but it just seems like elementary classroom parties have rocketed way out of control.  This, to me, is food for an adult party, not an afternoon school party.  And of course the kids will also get tons of candy as they trade Valentines.  Hmmm . . . I wonder why all our kids are overweight? 

Miscellany

Well, the good news is that the school principle responded to our email and agreed that there is a conflict with school policy.  All collected peanut butter jars are to kept in the elementary office.  (This was our main concern to begin with -- you can't have a peanut free classroom policy and then collect peanut butter jars in the classroom!  The teacher managed to spin that into us not caring about the hungry.  Sooo frustrating.)

Interestingly, Little Dude also brought home all his "100th Day" worksheets today.  One said, "In 100 years I hope that I can . . . " and Little Dude filled it out "eat whatever I am allergic to."   Sigh.  Chances are he'll be in heaven in 100 years, so I guess he'll be sitting down at God's banqueting table and digging in!  (And I'll be right there with him, rejoicing!)

Another worksheet said "If I had 100 dollars I would" to which Little Dude wrote "give to the poors."  Hmmm.  I think he has compassion in his limited 6-year-old way.  I really don't think bringing a jar of peanut butter is going to enhance that.

Peanut Butter Food Drive

Yes, you read that correctly.  Less than two months after enacting a policy that all elementary classrooms will be peanut and nut free, our lovely school is doing a peanut butter food drive.  What the @#$@Y^@%%@I$^O(!!!!!

Here's the real kicker.  I sent a very polite email to the principle, school nurse, and Little Dude's teacher explaining why he would not be participating and suggesting that this was a clear violation of their new policy.  Little Dude's teacher sent me an email back saying, in part:

"Wouldn't it be just like God to ask for peanut butter ~ taking us our of our comfort zone and asking us to be a part of something much bigger than ourselves? Giving is truly the lesson I see before us. Will we give only when it fits us, when we are comfortable with it, or will we give because we have been asked and it's the right thing to do?"

I am seething with anger right now, and since I can't send a scathing reply to Little Dude's teacher, I'm going to type it here instead.  How dare you suggest that God is asking us to bring peanut butter?  The stupid high school students are asking us to bring peanut butter!!  God knows how dangerous peanut butter is for Little Dude, and I can tell you for a fact this is not from Him!!!  Furthermore, God asks me to get out of my comfort zone every single day by sending Little Dude to a school where his safety, clearly, is no one's primary concern.   What's more important -- keeping my child alive or providing a meal for someone who's hungry?  And let's not forget that we could provide lots of diffferent foods for that hungry person that would not be life-threatening for my son. 

The teacher goes on:  "As far as feeling sad because he can't have any himself could be turned around to giving to someone who eats this product making their diet nutritious, ultimately making their life better . . . Giving something that we personally don't eat could be a positive life lesson of learning that we are all unique and have various differences; yet not allowing that to stop us from helping each other. Our class is in the middle of a nutrition unit and this school drive is perfect timing in teaching the different choices we have to reach a well balanced diet. Not all of our diets looks the same and that's OK. The end goal is to be healthy."

Oooookaaay.  First off, why should I have to turn it around?  Again, there are plenty of foods we could bring that would not make my child feel bad.  He's only six years old!  That's a little young to be able to put your personal feelings aside and focus on others instead.  And the nutrition unit they're doing in school?  Has any of that unit focused on Little Dude's unique nutritional needs?  NO!  He comes home every day with some new bit of nutritional information, and I have to tell him, "That's not true for you, buddy.  It's true for most people, but not for you." 

And lastly, my favorite part of the email:  "I contacted the student President of Key Club and he assured me everything has been approved and thought safe for ALL students.  Let's allow God to use each of us and embrace helping others regardless of our differences. It's not about us, it's about helping others. I ask you to please pray about allowing Nick to give...not because it fits him, but because it fits someone else's needs. I believe it will be a life lesson that he can embrace, feel good about and teach his own children. What a unique God we have. I'm so thankful He didn't make is all the same!"

Oh, so the President of the Key Club has an MD now?  Well, as long as a high school senior thinks it's safe I guess we'll go with it!  Are you kidding me!!?! 

And that last bit -- now I'm a bad, selfish Christian because I'm not allowing my son to participate in a peanut butter food drive.  Really? 

I just feel like I'm going round and round and round.  Every single year we have to go through this with one thing or another.  People always think I'm being selfish, and all I'm doing is trying to keep my kid alive.  How is that selfish?  How is that not God's will? 

Of course we can't say any of this to the teacher because we need her to be on our side for the rest of school year.  My wonderful husband sent a polite, but stern, reply explaining again why we are not participating, and emphasizing again that to have peanut butter jars in the classroom is a clear violation of school policy. 

And around we go.

Big News!

Hubby took a week of vacation right before Christmas, so we decided to head to Branson, Missouri for a little downtime.  While there, we checked into allergy friendly restaurants and found that Macaroni Grill had an allergen menu.  We were a little nervous, and we brought some backup food just in case, but we decided to give it a try.  (Little Dude was one year old the last time he ate restaurant food -- a plain burger, no bun at Red Robin, before we knew he had a beef allergy.  When he developed an itchy rash afterwards, we swore off restaurant food.   Soon after that we got all the rest of his allergies diagnosed and there was nothing he could possibly eat in a restaurant anyway.) 

We got to Macaroni Grill around 5:00, so there was no one else there, which we figured would allow the chef to really pay attention to Little Dude's food.  We ordered him a plain pork chop, just salt and pepper, and no sides.  (We brought some sides with us.)  He loved it.  He ate almost all of an adult size pork chop!  And here's the kicker: he also got to eat some lemon sorbet!!

It was a great experience.  The waiter was concerned and helpful, and really went the extra mile to help us out.  Little Dude was so happy.  He did get a very small rash on his face, but as my husband said, it was the mildest allergic reaction ever. 
We're hoping this is just the beginning!